Bad Movies

I had a choice between writing a retrospective on David Lynch’s haunting Lost Highway, or this embarrassing 1992 comedy starring Sylvester Stallone and Estelle Getty. Every reasonable cineaste would naturally choose the former. One movie…

Red Notice is an action-comedy starring Dwayne Johnson, Ryan Reynolds, and Gal Gadot — three people whose movies I generally avoid. Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson might have definite star power but he has a track…

I’m quietly a fan of Mystery Science Theater 3000. I didn’t grow up watching it and only discovered it in the last few years, but I really enjoy it. Riffing on bad movies is basically…

I like to think that the two best directors on the planet are Tommy Wiseau and Neil Breen. However, when it comes down to it, Neil Breen has the upper hand. He uses better special…

I love Step Up 3D. It’s quite possibly one of my favorite movies. But, my heavens, does it have some cringy dialogue. For those of you who don’t know, Step Up 3D is about a group of dancers,…

Tubi TV is a fascinating, free service full of cult oddities from around the world. It’s got a little bit of everything a movie fan could ever want. As such, on a recurring basis, we’re…

By now, everyone knows that Tommy Wiseau is by far one of the greatest actors in history. No other person can reach his level of emotion or his infectious charisma. Ever since his breakout performance…

Three days. It took me three days to finish watching Mrs. Serial Killer. What torture! And it will be even bigger torture not to write anything mean about Mrs. Serial Killer. Frankly, I don’t think…

Although it was received with mixed reviews, 2016’s The Boy attracted a reasonable amount of attention thanks to its unusual conclusion. It managed to steer clear of the familiar ‘creepy doll’ horror tropes and was…

Floria Sigismondi’s new horror flick, The Turning, which is based on Henry James’ The Turn of the Screw, had a lot of potential to be a refreshing addition to the genre, which is why it…

Cats is a lot of things: an eyesore, an acid and cocaine trip, nightmare fuel, you name it. It is not, however, a good movie. If anything, it’s a great reminder that Tom Hooper is…

Back to the Future Part II is iconic, but that doesn’t mean that it’s a good movie. While it’s flashy visuals and its satirization of America’s future are fun, the movie itself is a mess.…

Once you start critiquing movies, you can’t stop. Even in movies that I adored before, I can’t watch them without picking them apart. Do you realize how cringy the entirety of Cars (2006) is? I…

I’m one of the few moviegoers out there who was actually looking forward to seeing Fred Durst stalker-thriller/wacky John Travolta vehicle, The Fanatic. The fact that it’s already hailed as both a critical and financial…

I’m not one to be negative, but Illumination Entertainment really takes the cake for worst film studio ever created. They create some of the cringiest content I’ve ever seen. The only film Illumination halfway did…

A lot of people fell in love with The Greatest Showman upon its release in 2017. It took many on an emotional rollercoaster with its pop music and charming cast, leading to an extended theatrical…

Poor Colin Trevorrow. You really have to feel sorry for the guy. No matter what he does in future, he’ll always be remembered as either one of two things; The filmmaker that got famously fired…

Even though I praised November for its merits, it wasn’t without its faults (that’s VERY clear considering the movies I’ll discuss here). What makes it even more frustrating is that many of these films are…

In one of the lesser trends to continue in 2018, we have another low-budget horror movie in theaters the week after Thanksgiving. And in typical fashion for such movies, The Possession of Hannah Grace is a slog.…

It’s hard to believe that the first movie in The Twilight Saga came out just over a decade ago, yet here we are. 2008 was a different era for me — I was a 20-something in college…

Sometimes a movie catches you at exactly the right moment; a sweet spot of time, place, and circumstance where you’ll buy whatever that movie is selling. I watched Cocktail when I was a teenager at a…

Some movies receive tons of press and hype before their premiere and ultimately live up to their lofty expectations. However, some, like the following movies, really flop at the box office and with fans despite…

A story about Egyptian mythology, crazy special effects, stars such as Gerard Butler, Nikolaj Coster-Waldau, Chadwick Boseman and Geoffrey Rush…what’s not to love? Well, according to critics and moviegoers alike, everything! Gods of Egypt was…

The Room. Gosh, where do you begin with this colossal disasterpiece? How could you approach such a monumentally laughed at film with such sincerity and reverence? And how in God’s creation did a man none…

We all have our favorite movies.  From timeless classics to little seen gems, there’s tons of movies out there that are truly great.  Then, there’s the other side of that equation.  Sometimes, you love a…

We all love The Room.  From its horribly constructed dialogue and plot, it’s the best type of terrible, becoming a truly special film for the wrong reasons.  Naturally, love has poured on the “auteur” of the…

The next marketing ploy disguised as a movie is here, The Emoji Movie!  Somehow, a script full of emojis got its very own movie and a prime release date during the middle of the summer.  Regardless,…

Although War for the Planet of the Apes will most likely win the weekend, there’s another movie that is getting released, Wish Upon!  From the director of Annabelle (oof) comes the story of a demon wishing box that…

Thankfully, June was a pretty stellar month for film.  The month was filled with great films such as Wonder Woman, The Big Sick, and Baby Driver.  Hell, even Captain Underpants was incredibly entertaining!  However, every…

Michael Bay’s next installment in the Transformers franchise has come to theaters.  The fifth installment, entitled Transformers: The Last Knight, is the follow-up to the much maligned Transformers: Age of Extinction.  Although, the franchise has had some less than stellar…